Redsoxfan218's Weblog

What Have I Learned?

redsoxfan218 — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 21:26:29 +0000

I think that the most important thing I have learned in this class is the ability to improve my own writing–to my own standards. I feel like my writing improved for one reason: FEEDBACK! I know that sometimes it was a little annoying but I honestly feel that the feedback helped me. It allowed for me to put myself in my reader’s place so that I could work on making my writing more cohesive and making it easier to understand. One big thing about my writing is that I learned how to create better transitions. At the beginning of the semester my writing was a little choppy and I always had too much information in one small paragraph, that sometimes I would be the only person that could understand it. But now, peer editing and feedback has allowed me to tweek my writing to cater to an audience and to focus on main points.

Important Things I have Learned:

-Create good transitions

-Focus on one narrative thread

-Create a clearer thesis

-Cater to an audience

-Be aware of ethos, logos, and pathos

Things I Still Need to Work On:

- Catering to an audience

-Making my paper more cohesive

-Structure of paper

Conversations between Countries

redsoxfan218 — Tue, 27 Nov 2007 21:56:06 +0000

Steph’s numerous posts that we have been reading over the past couple of weeks are all—at least as I interpret—all connected to one major topic: conversation. It is something that we have been learning about in class for while now. But the basics have to come to be: there two sides to every argument, both sides have to be heard, and a give-and-take mechanism must reach a compromise at some point. I think that the issues between Israel and Palestine, if stripped down, are essentially one big conversation. Just as Steph realized that the conference that she was attending was just a conference, I interpret the conversation between Israel and Palestine to be just a conversation. Unfortunately the conversation between the two countries has become violent, and it is clear that something must be done. Conversation is part of the backbone of society, therefore, the two countries cannot completely function if they cannot have successful conversations. It will be hard to find a compromise between the two countries, but with the help of the other countries involved Israel and Palestine will be able to have a successful conversation. In one of the pictures a phrase in painted on a concrete wall, “Thou shall not build a wall”. The concrete wall is a metaphor for the disparity of ideas between the two countries and thus keeps them separated socially and geographically.

Student Strike

redsoxfan218 — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 16:10:05 +0000

I definitely agree with the ideas and thoughts that are driving the student strike. As a student paying my own way through college I have found the cost to be ridiuclous and I almost was not able to come to school. When I got to school I actually lost my $1000 off of my financial aid for no apparent reason and I am not the only one who has experienced the same problem. I do not think that the school understands–or cares what we have to go through as students. The school needs to definitely lower fees and that is the issue I can relate to the most. I have not decided if I will go to the rally for the strike, but I do support the cause.

“Another Brick in the Wall”

redsoxfan218 — Tue, 13 Nov 2007 22:01:14 +0000

We could not watch “The Wall” because the DVD would not work. So we listened to “Another Brick in the Wall”.

I definitely feel that the lyrics in this song were relevant. It talks about the education systems in the 1960s and how it was hard to conform but it was demanded by the teachers. The video of the song shows how the teachers were discouraging and condescending to the students. I feel like this is completely true in modern teaching. First off, we have to conform in every aspect of our lives but I do feel most obligated to conform at school because the teachers are so harsh. They do not treat us like we have the same mental capacities as them and sometimes it is like our thoughts do not matter if they are not what the teacher thinks. In the video there is a scene where the teacher asks why a student is writing poems. He is repressing the child’s creative talents and thoughts. This happens in modern education too because if a student does not do the assignment the way the teacher wants it to be done or takes another point-of-view the student is always wrong and there is rarely an occasion when the student can get the teacher to understand.

A New Face for the Wiki

redsoxfan218 — Thu, 01 Nov 2007 13:52:18 +0000

One of the junior writers that I disagreed with the most was AisforAstronaut. He seemed to critique our ability to give feedback by saying: “Many of the freshman students (and my junior peers for that matter) are shy about critiquing the work of others and are embarrassed to allow others to see their own work“(Aisforastronaut par. 3). I do not agree with this statement because I know that many people in my class do NOT care about giving feedback or getting it (at least I do not). Although we may not be giving the correct grammatical feedback we always try to be as honest as possible. Also I did not agree with AisforAstronaut’s opening statement “Anonymous blogging is powerful” (AisforAstronaut’s par. 1). As far as our class I know that almost everyone knows who each other are so the anonymous blogging part does not really exist except in the relationship between classes.

Another junior writer that I disagreed with the most, was one that made a statement that I felt did not characterize our class, “However not one of them have made a complaint about the actual wiki or weblog in itself”(Kmb04 par. 1). I think that we have all made comments about the Wiki’s insane confusion at times and even Steph knows that many of us, although we find the idea of Wiki and awesome idea, become confused with it. This is the basis of creating the Wikiteam and creating a new set-up so to speak. The Wiki definitely needs some work to become more user friendly because right now people feel like the mechanics of using Wiki overtake the benefits.

W26s1 was a junior writer that seemed to have the same impression as Kmb04. The writer had the impression that we were extremely willing to use the Wiki. In our class, it is not that we love to use the Wiki it is that we have to. But we do all know its benefits and wish that we could enjoy them instead of fumbling on our computers to find the ways to work the Wiki. Again, I believe this is why Steph feels the need to make the Wiki different and easier to use for the students so the benefits of the Wiki can actually be received.

One writer that I personally do not agree with is Rocketredflair because he claims that the Wiki has “…an easy flow of navigation” (Rocketredflair par. 1). This is the biggest complaint that I could have about the Wiki. I know the potential benefits of the Wiki to my learning and feedback but I cannot seem to notice them when I am spending half the class trying to get where I need to be on the Wiki before I can do my work.

All of these writers thoughts lead to one thing in my opinion: Steph’s willingness to change the ways of the Wiki. I am a member of the Wikiteam and we all agree that to in order for the Wiki to be used at its fullest potential, it definitely needs to be more user friendly and more appealing to students.

AisforAastronaut. “Feedback for Freshmen”. Weblog posting. Aisforastronaut’s Weblog. 24 Oct. 2007. U of Massachusetts. 31 Oct. 2007. http://aisforastronaut.wordpress.com/2007/10/24/feedback-for-freshman/.

Kmb04. “There is Always Pros and Cons”. Weblog posting. Kmb04’s Weblog. 24 Oct. 2007. U of Massachusetts. 31 Oct. 2007. http://kmb04.wordpress.com/2007/10/24/there-is-always-pros-and-cons/.

Rocketredflair. “A Safe Internet Addiction: the “Umass Wiki”. Weblog posting. Rocketredflair’s Weblog. 25 Oct. 2007. U of Massachusetts. 31 Oct. 2007. http://rocketsredflair.wordpress.com/2007/10/25/a-safe-internet-addiction-the-umass-wiki/.

W26s1. “Are the Freshmen Smarter than Us”. Weblog posting. W26s1’s Weblog. 25 Oct. 2007. U of Massachusetts. 31 Oct. 2007. http://w26s1.wordpress.com/2007/10/25/are-the-freshmen-smarter-than-us/.

Optimistic Opinions

redsoxfan218 — Tue, 30 Oct 2007 21:04:33 +0000

The first person that caught my attention with the little comment about our blogs was Carmella7, probably because she wrote “Go Sox” on the bottom. However, I then realized that Carmella7 seemed to give different views of each situation. For example, she analyzes the comments and she gives her own opinion. After reading all of the blogs I feel like she had the most different things to say because everyone basically said the same thing. “Steph’s connection with the students seems to be on a level as an advisor and friend”(Carmella7, par.2). This statement illustrated Carmella7’s comprehension of Steph’s teaching style in that she helps us learn by being approachable and open-minded. “I find rhetorical writing difficult but depth is a must, without examples and details there is a lack of interest in the piece”(Carmella7, par.3). I completely agree with Carmella7’s message here because I dislike the rhetorical situation but realize that it is imperative to understand to become a good writer. Another writer that I found to be most connected with was Shininginthewind. This blog was the only blog to talk about a “dialogue between readers”— “The Wiki and the blogs create a dialogue between writers”(Shininginthewind, par. 3). Not only does this person point out that the weblog feedback helps us become better writers but gives details and analysis about how it helps us. I think this person fits well with Carmella7 because they both give detailed reasons why Steph’s feedback assignments work instead of just stating the obvious. Aligirl22 is another writer that I happened to agree with. Like Shininginthewind and Carmella7, she gives a new outlook on feedback by introducing this statement, “By allowing her classes to use the Wiki as a resource for learning, Steph is creating a classroom”(Aligirl22, par.4). She points out that because when using the wiki and the blog people can comment on each other’s work it creates an interaction comparable to that in the classroom. I also liked Keithjagger’s blog because he introduces the weblog as a “forum for information about the class”(Keithjagger, par.4). Again like the other three junior writers he explains a new aspect about the wiki and blogs other than the benefit of feedback. I agree with his statements because the wiki and blog are always there to comment on and Steph usually replies in a good amount of time. All four of these junior writers stood out to me because they offered something different that no one else in the class pointed out. A lot of the other people focused on the benefits of feedback and basically explained what we did in this class while the four writers that I chose analyzed Steph’s techniques. Carmella7. “I Like Your Style”. Weblog posting. Carmella’s Weblog. 24 Oct. 2007. U of Massachusetts. 30 Oct. 2007. http://carmella7.wordpress.com/2007/10/24/i-like-your-style/.Shininginthewind. “Adding to the Conversation”. Weblog posting. ShiningintheWind’s Weblog. 24 Oct. 2007. U of Massachusetts. 30 Oct. 2007.< http://shininginthewind.wordpress.com/2007/10/24/adding-to-the-conversation/>. Aligirl22. “Feedback”. Weblog posting. Aligirl22’s Weblog. 24 Oct. 2007. U of Massachusetts. 30 Oct. 2007. < http://aligirl22.wordpress.com/2007/10/25/feed-back/>. Keithjagger. “The Wonderful World of Wiki”. Weblog posting. Keithjagger’s Weblog. 24 Oct. 2007. U of Massachusetts. 30 Oct. 2007. < http://keithjagger.wordpress.com/2007/10/25/the-wonderful-world-of-wiki/>.

My Day

redsoxfan218 — Thu, 25 Oct 2007 20:53:53 +0000

I am having a really bad day today. My doctor called me today and told me that I most likely have mono and that I have to come this weekend. Then, I came to english class and recieved my first C ever… which is so not cool. Plus, I woke up today to a bomb threat on campus and my roomate was not there.

I am sick and I obviously need to work a million times harder to do better in life.

Steph’s Feedback

redsoxfan218 — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 20:20:56 +0000

I think that Steph’s feedback will ultimately be beneficial to my peer reviewing skills. A lot of the things she pointed out focused the need to clarify and use examples. I do notice that although I understand my review bulleting, the author may not. It would have definitely been more helpful to the writer if I had used more examples to support my points. One thing that Steph pointed out as a useful tip to the writer was to summarize what I thought to be the main narrative thread. This could be extremely useful to the writer because then they can gage how well they have written and main their point clear. That way if I, the reader, though the narrative thread was completely different from what he had written it to be, the writer can re-draft the paper and make the message clearer.

Art Objects

redsoxfan218 — Tue, 16 Oct 2007 20:19:24 +0000

When I first started reading Winterson’s story it struck me as funny because I once had the similar reaction to a piece of art. Last summer when I was in Martha’s Vineyard I visited all of the art galleries (like always). But it was in one gallery that I found a painting that I found completely mesmerizing. As I found out it was not just the picture I loved but the artist and her technique. After I left Martha’s Vineyard I began looking up her art online and in books. My experience parallels that of Winterson’s because she too was struck by a painting that truly moved her–moved her into research. She began going to all galleries to try and find the meaning of art and reading books to understand art and how to interpret it. The piece affected me because I thought of my experience on Martha’s Vineyard in that little art gallery but the funny thing is I cannot for the life of me remember the artist’s name! I began searching feverishly for her or her paintings on the internet but I still have nothing. But I am determined to find it.

Steph’s Feedback on my Writing

redsoxfan218 — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 20:51:50 +0000

Although I did not get detailed feedback from Steph I was a little intimidated with what I recieved. Now I feel like I did a horrible job and I am dreading my grade. I think I am in shock because I honestly was not expecting to do that bad but I am SO relieved that we can rewrite our papers if we did that bad. I felt like I did explain Evita in the format “The Contexts that Make Me”. I tried to explain her background and the things she has expereinced has shaped the way she lives her life today. Hopefully, I can do a better job formatting next time!